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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22465114">Benefit</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/watchmegetobsessed/pseuds/watchmegetobsessed'>watchmegetobsessed</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Girls (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Friends With Benefits, Smut</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 18:34:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,964</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22465114</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/watchmegetobsessed/pseuds/watchmegetobsessed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You and Adam meet at an AA meeting and soon enough, a weird, but benefitial relationship forms between the two of you.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adam Sackler/Reader, Jessa Johansson/Adam Sackler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Benefit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hi! this is my first ever post here, i hope yall will like it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Walking into the room you’re still unsure if you actually want to be here, but a small voice in the back of your mind is telling you that this is exactly where you need to be. The place looks similar to the one you used to have your meetings back in Seattle, it’s simple, people are sitting in a circle and there is a small table with cookies and drinks at the side. There aren’t too many people and luckily they don’t really get stuck on the arrival of an unknown person so you can take an empty seat without getting any attention to yourself.</p>
<p>“Alright, everyone sit down, let’s start!” a tall, skinny guy speaks up, clipboard sitting on his lap as he patiently waits for everyone to sit in the circle and start the meeting.</p>
<p>You look around anxiously, the group is pretty diverse, men and women gathered from seemingly a lot of races and ages, though your eyes stop at one particular person sitting right across from you.</p>
<p>The guy seems tall, extremely tall to be honest, his almost black hair is grown out to reach almost his broad shoulders and it’s pushed back, eyes curiously examining the guy who just spoke as he licks his plump lips. He is not the typical handsome type, but there is just something in him that keeps pulling your gaze towards him even when people start talking around you.</p>
<p>A young guy starts talking two people to your right as you are still staring at the tall mystery guy when his eyes dart over to you and your gazes meet. You can’t help but feel intimidated even though nothing can be read from his face. You keep eye-contact for a few moments before turning away and forcing yourself to look at the guy talking. However you feel his eyes on you for a while before he finally decides to look away.</p>
<p>“That’s amazing, Tony, we are all proud of you!” Carl, the guy who spoke at the beginning of the meeting says as a short round of applause follows Tony’s speech. “Adam, do you feel like talking today?” he then turns to your guy and now you know his name. Adam.</p>
<p>“Sure,” he shrugs pushing himself up a little on the chair. “Hello, I’m Adam and I’m an alcoholic, but I haven’t had a drink for about a decade now. Some days are easier, some are harder, like the ones when my ex shows up and fucks things up for me,” he scoffs. “But things are going okay, I guess.”</p>
<p>“That’s great to hear, Adam. We all believe in you and hope you’ll continue your positive journey,” Carl nods as some other members hum in agreement. “Does anyone else want to speak up?” he asks looking around, but no one answers, so he takes it as a clue that the round of speeches are over. “In this case—“</p>
<p>“I thought new members supposed to introduce themselves,” Adam cuts him off and he is looking straight at you, causing your throat to close up from the sudden attention he just put on you.</p>
<p>“It is always welcomed, but no one is pressured to talk,” Carl assures smiling warmly at you. “Do you want to introduce yourself?”</p>
<p>Looking back at Adam one more time you decide to accept his silent challenge.</p>
<p>“Sure, why not?” you clear your throat, tugging your hair behind your ears. “Hi, my name is Y/N and I’m an alcoholic, but I’ve been clean for three years and seven months.”</p>
<p>The members in the circle mumble their greeting before you continue talking, arms crossed on your chest.</p>
<p>“I moved to the city just a few months ago and I’ve been struggling to adjust to the new environment so I thought it would be a good idea to visit a meeting, just to ensure myself.”</p>
<p>“You are always welcomed here whenever you feel like you are getting weaker,” Carl encourages you and you nod shortly.</p>
<p>“Thanks. I’m doing fine though, I haven’t really felt tempted to have a drink lately, so I guess I’m good.”</p>
<p>“That’s great to hear, we are all proud of you,” Carl smiles before moving on with the meeting.</p>
<p>When it all ends he invites everyone to stay and have a bite, chat with other members and you decide to head for a cookie from the table.</p>
<p>“So what brought you to New York City?” you hear Adam speak up from behind you and as you turn around there he is, standing tall in front of you. He looks pretty intimidating, but his eyes have this sense of softness in them that balances it out.</p>
<p>“Um, work. I got a great opportunity here so I thought I would take the chance.”</p>
<p>“Sounds serious. Do you always dress like this?”</p>
<p>His question catches you off-guard and you glance down at yourself to see what made him ask it. You’re wearing tight jeans with a white top and a leather jacket, nothing extra in your taste.</p>
<p>“What do you mean?”</p>
<p>“I mean that your clothes are pretty tight. They give a nice view of your body though.”</p>
<p>You don’t even know what to say at first, it’s like he doesn’t have a filter on his mouth and it’s so confusing to you, that all you can do is let out an anxious chuckle.</p>
<p>“Um, okay…” you mumble slowly turning back to the table, but he speaks up again.</p>
<p>“So, are you coming next week?”</p>
<p>“Not sure,” you say without looking at him. To be honest is too forward act is making you question if this is the group you should attend on a regular basis or not.</p>
<p>“Would be a shame if I didn’t see you next time,” he simply says before walking away, leaving you totally puzzled.</p>
<p>Adam is for sure the weirdest person you’ve met since moving here and you don’t think anyone can top him.</p>
<p>***</p>
<p>Friday night in the city is pretty busy. People just want to get the steam out after a hard, working week so they seek for fun times at bars and clubs. Adam Sackler is not the type to go to bars that much since it’s always a kind of temptation for him, but when his colleagues from his recent play asked him to come down for a few drinks with them he thought it might be a good time even if he doesn’t drink.</p>
<p>The place is crowded and the six of them are pressed up in a small booth, that was all they could get upon arrival, but they don’t mind it. They talk about the past couple of shows and critics, just having a good time when Adam excuses himself to go to the restroom. As he pushes his way through the people around the bar his eyes almost glide over a familiar face, but then he recognizes you. Without a second thought he makes his way over where you are sitting on a stool, hands gripping the edge of the counter as you stare ahead of you.</p>
<p>“What a pleasant surprise!” he beams arriving to you, making you jump in your seat.</p>
<p>“Adam, hello,” you mumble coming out of your zoned out state you were just in.</p>
<p>“You weren’t at the meeting this week.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I… Something came up,” you anxiously say. It didn’t happen because of him, you had other things to worry about when this week’s meeting was happening so you decided to skip.</p>
<p>“You alright?” he asks, eyebrows furrowed as he eyes you with concern.</p>
<p>“Mm, everything is… great,” you nod with a fake smile and you try to push the glass of whisky away without him noticing, but you don’t succeed.</p>
<p>“Y/N, were you thinking about drinking?”</p>
<p>“No, I just—“</p>
<p>“You ordered that drink?” he snaps cutting you off and you don’t answer, just stare ahead of you. “Did you order that drink?” he repeats his question with a raised tone that’s still not too loud for the people around since the music is louder, but chills run down your spine from it.</p>
<p>“I did,” you admit feeling the tears building up in your eyes and you hate yourself for being so weak. Who starts crying in the middle of a bar with a guy who they barely even know? You, apparently.</p>
<p>Clicking his tongue he scoots closer to you, leaning on the counter with one arm as he tries to turn the conversation as private as it can be in a crowded bar.</p>
<p>“You want to talk?”</p>
<p>Adam doesn’t seems like the guy who is into emotional talking, but when it comes to drinking he always feels the importance of the situation. Knowing his own struggle with alcohol he is aware that sometimes you just need to get it off your chest, you don’t even want that drink, but it’s hard to talk to someone who hasn’t been where you have. People who are not alcoholic don’t understand what you go through and it’s nice to finally talk to someone who knows exactly what you feel because they’ve been through it.</p>
<p>“I…” you sigh sadly as you wipe your tears away, trying not to look too pathetic. “It’s a long story.”</p>
<p>Adam bites the inside of his cheeks as he glances back at his colleagues and then at you. He has to choose between a bunch of people who are having a nice time and someone who seems really in need for his help. He might be a weird guy, but his priorities are set right.</p>
<p>“I live a few blocks from here. You’re welcomed to come over and pour it all out.”</p>
<p>“You can’t seriously choose some unknown girl from your AA meeting over your friends,” you roll your eyes feeling like he is just feeling pity for you.</p>
<p>“They are not my friends, most of them are annoying as fuck sometimes,” he bluntly says and he means it. “My offer still stands.”</p>
<p>Looking up at him you contemplate what you should do. Deep down you know it’s not too responsible to go to some random dude’s place alone to cry to him about your miserable life, but it somehow still sounds better than staying here and maybe lose control and drink that damn whisky you’ve been eyeing for about an hour now.</p>
<p>“Alright, but if I end up dead in an alley I’ll come back and haunt you for the rest of your life,” you mumble climbing off the stool and Adam just chuckles at your comment.</p>
<p>After letting his colleagues know that he is leaving the two of you hit the streets, heading to his apartment that’s pretty close to the bar. Stepping inside you are not too surprised at what you see. It’s kind of like how you had imagined his living space to be, not that you thought that much about him since the last meeting.</p>
<p>“You want something to drink?” he asks walking over to the fridge and you freeze. “I mean, something non-alcoholic. I don’t have alcohol here.”</p>
<p>“Oh. Um, a glass of water maybe.”</p>
<p>He nods and while he pours your and his drink you sit at the small dining table, curiously eyeing the smaller details in his home.</p>
<p>“Here,” he hands you the water and sits across you with a glass of milk that makes you frown.</p>
<p>“Are you drinking milk? Alone?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, it’s my thing,” he shrugs and chugs half of it down at once. “So, you wanna talk about what made you want to break your sobriety?”</p>
<p>Taking a deep breath you lean back and let a grimace cross your face as you remember the whole shitshow that went down.</p>
<p>“My ex called me today.”</p>
<p>“Despite how you ended up, was it a good or a bad thing?” he asks wanting to put the picture together about how they ended.</p>
<p>“Bad. He didn’t take it too well when I moved and now he is even more upset that I told him I’m not planning on going back anytime soon.”</p>
<p>“But you said you got a good job here.”</p>
<p>“I did.”</p>
<p>“Shouldn’t he be happy that you are successful?”</p>
<p>“No, because he is a toxic asshole who just can’t let me be happy,” you let out a bitter chuckle shaking your head at the thought how much time you wasted on him. “So he called to remind me that I am nothing without him and I’ll die alone because no one will ever want me with all the baggage I come with.”</p>
<p>“Baggage?” he frowns confused.</p>
<p>“My drinking problem, and the anxiety it’s been causing me. Staying sober is harder than I thought it would be.”</p>
<p>Talking to Adam about your struggle with sobriety feels easier than to anyone ever. You are not afraid of being judged because the two of you are kind of on the same path when it comes to drinking.</p>
<p>“He is a total asshole, if you ask me. Like he is a saint with no baggage. The guy himself is the baggage!” he scoffs drinking up the rest of his milk and you smile seeing that part of his facial hair his painted white from it that he licks down like a little kid even though he definitely does not look like one.</p>
<p>“How long did you two date?”</p>
<p>“About two years. It was getting pretty serious when I got the news that I got the job and then we ended it before I left.”</p>
<p>“You are better off without him, don’t worry.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, thanks.”</p>
<p>As much as the first time talking to Adam turned out to be pretty weird, you find yourself enjoying his company. With time, you get used to his forward style, blurting out everything without filtering his words. It’s a little frustrating at first, but later you find it amusing that he is not afraid to speak his mind, unlike others who just say what they think you want to hear. It’s a pleasant surprise to realize that you can actually talk with him about a lot of things and it doesn’t take too long for you to get comfortable in his company.</p>
<p>“It was just a whole shit show, to be honest,” he scoffs running his fingers through his hair. “I’m kinda praying I will never see Hannah nor Jessa again.”</p>
<p>“You sort of brought this whole drama to yourself,” you chuckle after hearing his story about her history with her ex and her best friend. One hell of a drama, for sure.</p>
<p>“I know!” he growls. “I’m so stupid sometimes, but I just couldn’t stop myself! Jessa was like this fucking sex witch, I just couldn’t keep myself away from her and she knew it. I just pray she doesn’t show up and try to jump on my dick again.”<br/>You start laughing at his words, knowing exactly what it’s like to not let go of someone because of the sex.</p>
<p>“It’s fucked, I know. Like, you just want to hate them in peace but then they come back and boom, the next thing you know is that he is balls deep inside me.”</p>
<p>“Well, no one is usually balls deep inside me, I’m the one doing that, but I agree,” he jokes making you laugh even more.</p>
<p>“Everything would be perfectly solved if we just found a way to get that tension out of our system and then we could easily cut these toxic people,” you sigh leaning your head against the wall as you hug your knees to your chest.</p>
<p>“I know a way.”</p>
<p>“And what would that be?”</p>
<p>“We should fuck.”<br/>Your eyebrows arch, eyes widen as you look over at him, no sign of joking on his face.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry, what?”</p>
<p>“You heard me right, we should fuck. I mean, we both need the same thing and I can tell you find me attractive.”</p>
<p>“Why are you so sure about that?”</p>
<p>“I can tell when a woman wants me naked, but don’t feel ashamed, I think you’re hot too.”</p>
<p>“Wow, that’s nice to know,” you chuckle, still in disbelief of where this conversation just headed suddenly.</p>
<p>“When I saw you at the meeting the first time I imagined you sitting there naked. Not the best thing to think about when there are a bunch of other people in the room,” he admits and you can’t help but smile at what he just said. “I think we both would just benefit from it. Having good ass sex and finally cutting our toxic exes off, I see it as a win-win.”</p>
<p>He is not wrong. Actually, the more you think about the smarter it sounds in your head. You literally have nothing to lose, just have at least one great night and you don’t have to go home and satisfy yourself with the showerhead for once. Instead, this tall, muscular man could give you a good time for a change.</p>
<p>You stare at him for a few more moments before you show every doubt into the back of your mind and decide to give this slice of happiness to yourself.</p>
<p>“Alright, fuck it, let’s do it,” you sigh jumping to your feet and a second later you are sitting on his lap, lips crashing to his as his hands grab you ass with passion.</p>
<p>“You’re not gonna regret it,” he smirks standing up and keeping you in his arms, your legs wrapping around his waist as he heads into his bedroom. “Just so you know, I can get a little carried away during sex.”</p>
<p>“What, are you gonna try to kill me or something?” you ask a little out of breath kissing the corner of his mouth before he lays you down to the bed and gets on top of you, one knee between your legs and you bring against his thigh, making him groan in pleasure already.</p>
<p>“No, but I have a pretty dirty mouth,” he scoffs kissing you again. “Don’t get offended by my words.”</p>
<p>“Call me whatever you want as long as I end up screaming your name,” you cockily challenge him, and your words make his cock twitch.</p>
<p>It doesn’t take too long until you both get naked and Adam flips you over, pushing inside you from the back as you hold onto the headboard of his bed.</p>
<p>“Jesus, yes!” you pant from the sensation. He fills you up just right, his strong hands holding onto your hips steadily as he keeps slamming into you in a fast pace, the slapping sound of your bodies colliding filling the room along with your moans and his groans.</p>
<p>“Yes, you feel so fucking good, you fucking bitch,” he growls slapping your ass and you find yourself enjoying his dirty talks and rough ways of fucking you.</p>
<p>He is by far the best sex partner you’ve had and he makes sure you are just as satisfied as he is. He comes with his fingers digging into your ass, pushing almost all of his weight on you as he growls your name and it’s enough for you to throw you off the edge as well.</p>
<p>“Fuck! Adam!” you moan, your arms collapsing, your face buried into the pillow that smells exactly like him.</p>
<p>He pushes into you a few more times before pulling out leaving you with a feeling of emptiness now that he is not filling you up. You lie down on the covers as he goes to grab you a wash cloth. When he returns he kneels up to the bed and rolls you to your back opening up your knees so he can clean you up himself. When he is done he leans down and presses a kiss to your clit.</p>
<p>“This is one hell of a pussy. I can’t wait to eat it,” he says before standing up and you can’t help but laugh. He climbs onto the bed pulling the covers over the two of you as you lie there next to him, still in bliss from the orgasm he just gave you.</p>
<p>“Any regrets?” he asks turning to you.</p>
<p>“None,” you smirk rolling to your side, bringing your fingers up to his chest you start drawing patterns to it.</p>
<p>“Great. Another satisfied customer,” he jokes and you smack his chest before he wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls you to his side.</p>
<p>“Can I stay the night? I don’t have the energy to go home right now.”</p>
<p>“Sure, but I get clingy while sleeping so you might end up with me wrapped around you.”</p>
<p>“That’s fine,” you chuckle before closing your eyes and letting yourself fall asleep after this hell of an eventful day.</p>
<p>You and Adam, it quickly becomes regular. It usually just takes a text or a call and either of you would end up in the other’s apartment by the end of the day, gladly fucking the night away. A stressful day, an unpleasant encounter with a friend, fight with parents, these all ended up as reasons to stand on the other person’s doormat that evening and neither of you said no to these occasions, equally needing the diversion from the problems in your life. And it wasn’t always just sex, you often met up just to hang out that ended up in some crazy, breathtaking sex, but it wasn’t unusual to spend the rest of the evening together once both of you were satisfied. You had to admit Adam was a nice person to be around. Not too serious, full of secrets you were dying to find out so that your picture of him would grow with each time you saw him.</p>
<p>One evening when Adam is over at your place, things just aren’t going right even though you try to focus on him. He is sitting on your couch with you on his lap, casually making out, his hands on your breasts under your shirt and even though you feel aroused, you are just not in the right place in your head.</p>
<p>“Okay, this literally feels like I’m making out with an aunt or something,” he sighs breaking off and you sit back to his thigh as his hands slide out of your shirt down to your waist. “What’s wrong?”</p>
<p>“Nothing,” you lie, but you can’t fool him.</p>
<p>“Cut the bullshit, Y/N. I can tell something is fucking your pretty mind up, so why don’t you just tell me?”</p>
<p>“I just had a stressful day at work, is all.”</p>
<p>“What happened?”</p>
<p>“My boss is up in my ass lately, because I’m a little behind with my project. I still have a lot of time to finish so I’m not worried, but he is and it’s stressing me out.”</p>
<p>“What made you fall behind?”</p>
<p>“I just had to face some unforeseen problems, but now it’s all good, I just have to pick up the pace a little bit before we present to the board. But Greg is like a psycho, he thinks I’ll run out of time and he is giving me such a hard time all day. He checks in on me every hour, asking about what progress I’ve made and he gets angry when I don’t say what he wants to hear.”</p>
<p>“He sounds like a total loser to me.”</p>
<p>“He kind of is,” you mumble under your breath, fingers playing with the hem of his shirt.</p>
<p>“Just ignore him, you’ll be done in time, I’m sure.” He gently squeezes your hips and leaning up he kisses your lips softly. “Why don’t we order some food and then doze out in bed?”</p>
<p>“But you came for the sex.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, but that requires at least two people and you are obviously not in the mood right now, so I’m fine.”</p>
<p>“Are you sure?” you frown bringing your hands up to the base of his neck.</p>
<p>“Positive.”</p>
<p>He doesn’t make a big deal out of it and he honestly seems fine with just simply hanging out without the sex part. You order pizza, he eats most of it, but you are fine with it, then you start watching a movie, but both of you fall asleep pretty early into it. When you wake up it’s already over, Adam is passed out next to you, arms wrapped around your waist. Shutting your laptop down you lie back, turning to face him. He looks like a sweet giant, sleeping peacefully, his dark hair is one big patch on your light colored pillow.</p>
<p>As you stare at him he starts stirring in his sleep and a few moments later his eyes open, looking a little confused.</p>
<p>“Hey, you alright?” he whispers blinking at you.</p>
<p>“Yeah, I just… put the laptop away.”</p>
<p>“Oh, okay,” he nods into the pillow as he pulls you closer to him and kisses the top of your head. “Go back to sleep, kid.”</p>
<p>You smile at the way he called you as you nuzzle against his chest and let yourself drift back to sleep.</p>
<p>Hanging out without having sex happens more and more often after that night. And it’s not always you who initiates it. You often go out to have lunch together whenever Adam is near your workplace in the middle of the day, you two go see movies together, do grocery shopping together and neither of these end up in sex. Though it still happens a lot, not that you mind, because sex with Adam is just perfect. He knows exactly what to do to make you lose your shit and never leaves you unsatisfied.</p>
<p>But as the days go by you realize there’s been a slight change in how things are between you and him. One day you catch yourself wondering about what he must be doing right now and you realize you’ve been doing it a lot. Thinking about Adam whenever you are not with him, looking forward to see him again as soon as possible.</p>
<p>After all, he has become a regular person in your every days and if you think about it it’s hard to stay objective about this odd relationship you two have started.</p>
<p>When your project finally gets finished and presented the first person you call is Adam to tell him how great things went.</p>
<p>“That’s amazing, kid! I knew it would be alright.”</p>
<p>“Wanna celebrate tonight?”</p>
<p>“Sure!” </p>
<p>“Your place at seven?”</p>
<p>“Perfect. See you tonight.”</p>
<p>You feel excited to spend yet another evening with Adam. You finish getting ready a bit earlier than you were supposed to and decide to just arrive before seven. It doesn’t occur to you that maybe you shouldn’t go there before the time you two agreed on, but you only realize this upon arriving.</p>
<p>The door to his apartment is open and you unsurely push it open walking inside.</p>
<p>“Adam?” you call out, peeling your coat off yourself, but there’s no answer. Instead, a few seconds later a blonde woman appears with at first curious eyes, but they soon turn into something clearly unfriendly.</p>
<p>“Who are you?” she asks tilting her head to the side and this is when you notice the cut on her hand and the broken glass on the floor of the kitchen.</p>
<p>“Who are <em>you</em>?” you ask back. “And where’s Adam?”</p>
<p>“He is clearly not here. I’m Jessa, but who the fuck you are?”</p>
<p>Hearing her name your throat tightens. Standing face to face of the ex you’ve heard so much about is entirely different from what you thought it would be. She is pretty, looks like a really badass person who doesn’t give a fuck about the world and lives by her own rules. So different from you on many ways and suddenly, you feel like you’re nothing.</p>
<p>Adam told you about how crazy things used to get when him and Jessa were having sex and seeing the mess in the kitchen and her hand, you figure she came over, they hooked up and things got out of hands, probably.</p>
<p>“I-I’m…” You’re not sure what to say, but there’s one thing you know and that’s the fact that you want to get the hell out of here right now.</p>
<p>As you turn around the door swings open and Adam walks in with a little white plastic bag in his hand.</p>
<p>“Okay I got bandaids, but—Y/N, you’re here early.” He freezes, his hand still holding the handle as he stares at you.</p>
<p>“Yeah, I uh… Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to interrupt anything, but I’m already on my way out, so…”</p>
<p>You try to push you way past him, but he grabs your arm and keeps you back.</p>
<p>“No, wait, this is not what you think,” he insists, but you don’t want to hear it.</p>
<p>“Adam, it’s fine. You can do whatever you want. I just… I just wanna go home now. Please,” you whisper the last word, basically begging him.</p>
<p>“Just let her go,” you hear Jessa call out from inside and it’s like a stab into your chest. His hand slowly peels off you and before he could say anything you turn around and leave as fast as possible.</p>
<p>This is wrong, this shouldn’t hurt this bad, because nothing really happened. You and Adam are not a couple, you shouldn’t feel like this because you saw him with his ex. He has the right to do whatever he wants, because you and him has no commitments towards each other.</p>
<p>Arriving back home you head for a hot shower and let your tears roll down your cheeks, mixing with the water as you just stand there, and quietly keep sobbing, feeling like the biggest loser in the city.</p>
<p>You let yourself catch feelings for someone who is obviously not interested in you in a serious way and now you are the one, feeling broken again.</p>
<p>Adam tries to call you that night, but you turn your phone off, feeling like you need some time apart from him to get things straight in your head.</p>
<p>“Are you happy now?” Adam snaps at Jessa after you leave, and he slams the door shut, feeling his anger building up.</p>
<p>“Don’t be so dramatic,” she rolls her eyes as she grabs the plastic bag from his hands and turns her attention at the bandaids he just got for her after she successfully slammed a glass at the counter and cut her hand in the heat of the fight they just had right before.</p>
<p>“Jessa, get the fuck out of here!”</p>
<p>“Are you really throwing me out?”</p>
<p>“I am, yes!”</p>
<p>“I had something else in my mind,” she seductively smiles stepping closer to Adam, sliding his hands up his chest, ready to kiss him, but he pushes her away this time.</p>
<p>“Stop it. I want you out of my place, now!” he barks walking past her and she is truly surprised at the way he is resisting her now.</p>
<p>“What the fuck has happened to you?”</p>
<p>“Nothing, I’m just done with you! I don’t want anything to do with you! So stop showing up at my place, because next time I’m gonna call the cops on you.”</p>
<p>“You can’t be serious, Adam,” she laughs shaking her head in disbelief.</p>
<p>“Actually, I have never been this serious, Jessa.”</p>
<p>“But why are you doing this now?”</p>
<p>“Because I don’t love you, anymore!” he snaps, his voice rumbling through the whole apartment. “I don’t love you, because I’m… Because I’m in love with Y/N, alright?!”</p>
<p>“What? With that girl?” she asks with utter disgust showing on her face as she gestures towards the front door.</p>
<p>“Yes! Because she doesn’t treat me like shit, she is actually interested in me and cares for me and I enjoy spending time with her, unlike you! So get the fuck out of here already, so I can make things right that you just screwed up, again!”</p>
<p>Jessa is a clever girl and now he sees that she is truly unwanted here. So grabbing her bag from the couch she heads for the door, but stopping she leaves him one last comment.</p>
<p>“Fuck you, Sackler,” she says flipping him off before finally leaving.</p>
<p>Adam feels vivid, he feels like he is about to break something and he needs everything in him to keep his cool and not ruin something. He needs some time to calm down before he feels like he is able to talk. Reaching for his phone he calls your number, but it goes almost straight to the voicemail.</p>
<p><em>“Hey, it’s Y/N. Leave a message and maybe I’ll call you back!”</em> your pre-recorded voice greets him and he ends the call with a grunt before he could hear the beep.</p>
<p>“Fuck!” he snaps, his hand gripping the phone tightly. He tries to call you a few more times before leaving a short message to you.</p>
<p>“Y/N, please call me back. I can explain everything!”</p>
<p>But you don’t call him back, leaving him sleepless through the whole night.</p>
<p>Adam decides to give you some time, so you can come to him whenever you feel comfortable, but when he hears nothing from you for three days he can’t push his worries aside any longer.</p>
<p>Walking down the street to your apartment he keeps thinking about everything he wants to tell you, practicing it so he knows exactly what to say when he is standing in front of you, but his plans quickly get blown away when he spots you walk out of your building with a bearded guy who he recognizes as your ex, Luke, because you’ve shown pictures of the two of you before.</p>
<p>“Y/N?” he calls out, taken aback of seeing you with him and as you turn your head, your mouth hangs open. You weren’t expecting to see him and the timing is just the worst.</p>
<p>“Adam, what are you doing here?” you anxiously ask, glancing at Luke who is curiously eyeing him. Now that they are standing so close to each other you realize how much bigger Adam is than Luke, taller and definitely stronger.</p>
<p>“You didn’t answer my calls, I really wanted to talk to you.”</p>
<p>“Now is not the best time.”</p>
<p>“Hey, I’m Luke,” he chimes in holding out a hand for Adam, but he completely ignores it and his whole existence.</p>
<p>“You didn’t even let me tell you what really happened, just left and then never picked the phone up. The whole Jessa thing wasn’t what it looked like.”</p>
<p>“You don’t have to explain yourself, Adam. You can do whatever you want.”</p>
<p>“I’m sorry, would someone fill me in about what’s going on?” Luke asks and you and Adam answers at the same time, in different manners.</p>
<p>“Just a moment, Luke.”</p>
<p>“Shut the fuck up, Assface!”</p>
<p>“Adam!” you give him a look. You really don’t want to make a scene on the street and you know how Adam’s temper works.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry, but who do you think you are? Coming here and rudely call me names in front of my girlfriend who clearly doesn’t want to talk to you.”</p>
<p>“I’m not your girlfriend,” you snap at him and he gives you that look you know all too well. It’s the one he used to give you when he wanted you to be a nice little obeying girl and do whatever he wanted you to do. But it doesn’t work on you anymore.</p>
<p>“We’ll talk about it later. Get in the car, Y/N,” he tells opening the door of the black car parked right in front of the building.</p>
<p>“Luke, I’m not going anywhere with you and I’m not your girlfriend. Stop trying to have control over me!”</p>
<p>“I’m not having this discussion here right now. Get in the car!” he sneers and grabbing your arm he pulls you to the car, but you push his hand away and stumble back. You’re just about to tell him off when Adam stands between the two of you.</p>
<p>“Hey, stop touching her! She doesn’t want to go with you!”</p>
<p>“Who the fuck are you? Just get lost and leave us alone!” Luke makes the mistake of pushing Adam’s shoulder and in that moment you already know what is about to happen.</p>
<p>“Fuck you, Assface!” Adam growls and before you could even try to stop him, his fist collides with Luke’s face, making him smack against the side of the car with a painful growl. “You have no respect for her and you don’t deserve her!” he shouts, making people start to stop and stare at what’s happening.</p>
<p>“Adam, that’s enough. Come on.” You grab his arm and start pulling him backwards. At first he resists, but then he turns around and the two of you leave the growling Luke there to deal with his pain alone.</p>
<p>“You really shouldn’t have done that,” you shake your head at him once you are up in your apartment, alone.</p>
<p>“Honestly, I thought you’d be angrier at me for the punch,” he admits stopping in the middle of the living room, hands on his hips. You just shake your head smiling.</p>
<p>“He kinda deserved it, so…”</p>
<p>“The asshole deserved more than just a punch! I wish I could rub his face into the asphalt!”</p>
<p>“Okay, stop, I don’t want you to get arrested for assault.”</p>
<p>“It would worth it! The way he talked to you and touched you, had my blood boiling.”</p>
<p>He huffs to himself, needing a minute to calm down and then he remembers the real reason why he came here. His eyes fall back on you and you get lost in how soft they are.</p>
<p>“Y/N, we need to talk.”</p>
<p>“Adam, it’s really not—“<br/>“No, you are going to let me talk!” he demands so you close your mouth and listen. “Nothing happened with Jessa. She came over unannounced and we got into a fight, because I said I don’t want to get back together with her. She got crazy and slammed the glass against the counter and it cut her hand. I didn’t have any bandaids at home so I had to run to the store to get some. Then you arrived and completely misunderstood the whole thing, but I threw her out after. She was losing it completely, but I didn’t want anything to do with her.”</p>
<p>Hearing the truth you feel a wave of relief washing over you as you find out things were different from what you thought. He didn’t hook up with her, in fact, he seemingly completely ended everything between them and it felt like victory to you.</p>
<p>“Okay. I believe you,” you softly say and Adam exhales sharply hearing your reply.</p>
<p>“Alright, now tell me what this shithead was doing here.”</p>
<p>“He just showed up, out of nowhere,” you roll your eyes crossing your arms on your chest. “He tried to lure me into moving back to Seattle, but I was having none of it. He said he had a table reserved for us, that’s where we were heading when you arrived and punched him,” you say smiling to yourself.</p>
<p>“So you didn’t get back together with him?”</p>
<p>“No,” you shake your head.</p>
<p>“Is there… Is there a specific reason why you didn’t want to get back together with him?” he questions and you feel your cheeks burning.</p>
<p>“Why do you want to know?”</p>
<p>“I’ll tell you why. Because the reason why I didn’t want Jessa back is that I fell for you.”</p>
<p>You gasp at his words, staring at him in awe as he slowly starts walking towards you.</p>
<p>“I know it all started as just a way of coping, but… Y/N, I fell in love with you. This sounds cheesy as fuck, but it really happened. It’s not about just sex anymore, well, that’s fucking amazing as well,” he adds making you laugh. “But I want more. I love sleeping with you in my arms, waking up next to you, have breakfast with you and talk about your nonsense dreams. I want to hear about the stuff that worries you and I want to be the person you come to when things get rough. I didn’t think this is how it would turn out to be, but… It happened! And now I guess I’m stuck with this feeling, hoping you won’t turn me down.”</p>
<p>You’ve never seen Adam Sackler this nervous, standing in front of you, waiting for any kind of response from you after his confession. His words spoke from your heart and knowing he feels the same way is just ecstatic.</p>
<p>Closing the distance between the two of you, your hands slide up to the back of his neck bringing him down, but just when his lips are about to touch yours, you stop.</p>
<p>“I love you too, you loser,” you grin before finally kissing him, earning a relieved growl as his arms wrap around you and lifting you up he spins you around while kissing you.</p>
<p>“I hope you know that I’ll be around you 24/7 now, you’ll get sick of me,” he warns you putting you down, but keeping you in his arms.</p>
<p>“Not if you get sick of me first.”</p>
<p>“That’s not happening. I can never get enough of you,” he says burying his face into your chest while his hands grip your ass, making you laugh at him.</p>
<p>“Alright, we’ll see. But now I want you to fuck me like there’s no tomorrow,” you tell him and his head shoots up in excitement.</p>
<p>“That’s something I can definitely do. Anything for my girl!”</p>
<p>Lifting you up into his arms your lips reconnect as he carries you into your bedroom, the two of you falling into the sheets like dominos and soon you become just one big naked mass, limbs tangled, lips glued together, occasional ‘I love you’s breaking the moaning and panting.</p>
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